Choose Your Grandparents Well

Depression,Life Experience,Motivation,Psychology,Self Esteem

Date : April 23, 2016Comments : 0

Choose Your Grandparents Well

There is no doubt that what we inherit from our parents, grandparents and more distant relatives has an impact on our make-up as a person. Hair colour, height and other physical characteristics can all often be recognised in the family photo album as having their source some generations back. It is also true that certain difficulties – both physical and mental – can be passed down from our ancestors.


Some types of cancer, depression and some psychotic disorders can be attributed, at least in part, to those that came before us (see Cancer Research UK and NHS News).  There is evidence to suggest a link between a condition rearing its head in years gone by, and then the recurrence of that condition in a branch further down the family tree. It would seem, then, that the hand we are dealt in terms of our wellbeing is, in part, determined before we even know there is a game to be played.


If our allocation is to some extent decided in advance then, what hope is there of successfully tackling mental and physical conditions passed down from others? I would suggest that although the cards in our hand are important, how we play them is of far greater significance. Research suggests that diet, lifestyle and attitude are crucial when it comes to determining the ultimate outcome of some of the undesirable legacies we face (see NHS Choices and Psychology Today). Coming to terms with what is on our plate, be it of our choosing or not, is important in learning to move forward and to make the best life possible for ourselves and those we care about.


Sometimes clients attend therapy looking to change a certain aspect of their lives, yet sometimes the facts of their particular situation are quite set.  In such an instance, learning to reassess and take a different stance – to accept the unchangeable rather than to break our head against it – can be a good use of the time spent in the counselling relationship.  So, although it has been suggested that the key to mental wellbeing and physical robustness is to ‘choose your grandparents well’, perhaps looking for meaning in adversity and positivity in a seemingly dark situation will be what we can influence, and may well improve our everyday lives.

What do you have to lose by adapting your viewpoint?

~ Rob Oglesby MBACP B.A. (Hons) BSc | Ashwood Therapy

[Ashwood Therapy provides a discreet, confidential and professional online counselling service by encrypted video call, live instant messaging and secure email.  More details, including tips on wellbeing and information on current counselling session pricing, can be found at]



Date : April 21, 2016Comments : 0

6 traits of a survivor of severe depression

Hi dear readers, this is a blog post not to scare you or be negative or to make others feel pity or any form of empathy, I am creating this blog post for those people who are suffering with severe depression, living with a person who has been diagnosed with the condition or for people to understand why some people may seem a little different compared to other people you encounter. In this blog we explore what life is like ‘after’ surviving severe depression.

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Depression,Life Experience

Date : April 9, 2016Comments : 0

8 – “Some days it hits you like a ton of water” – ‘Til The Sun Goes Down – Boyzone

In the past, the only time my demons have been silenced at all is when we have been in Scotland. There’s something about the pace of life in the towns, the lack of people and the massive open spaces of mountains that just makes me feel calm and able to breathe. To say I had been looking forward to this latest break would be a massive understatement. I didn’t stop to think that the demons would pack their suitcases and come on holiday too.
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Anti-Bullying,Depression,Life Experience,Motivation

Date : April 3, 2016Comments : 0

10 celebs that were bullied and how bullying experiences can end up being positive

You may not realise but many successful people are often victims of bullying or ridicule at a  young age and sometimes, into adulthood. People that get bullied tend to stand out from others for having different interests, a unique look or be special in some way and become easy targets for those who prefer to blend in and “be part of the in crowd” rather than following their own passions and interests for fear of being on the end of the cruel words, beatings and constant teasing.

In this blog post we explore how bullying feels for those who are experiencing it, how it can have detrimental effects on people’s lives and mental health but also, how once you get over the painful emotions, a bullied person can take the experience and make it a motivation and power to change their lives into a more positive life than any of their bullies may have thought possible for them.

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Depression,Life Experience

Date : March 29, 2016Comments : 0

7 – “Every day you’re my inspiration” – Effortlessly You – Shane Filan

So much of my life is spent talking about my youngest daughter, discussing her life with medics or telling friends and family about her latest deterioration or achievement. My eldest daughter often gets overlooked, people don’t ask after her as often, yet she has her own struggles and difficulties as any child growing up does, and as much as I try to hide my depression and keep things together around her, there is no doubt that my demons have an impact on her life.

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Date : March 15, 2016Comments : 0

6 – “When it seems like the end, I feel the arms of a stranger rescue me” – Sandi Patty – Unexpected Friends

The last week or so has been really difficult. My little lady has been very unwell, and in addition, my Husband and I have had several meetings and discussions with various professionals involved in her care about her future. Thankfully she has rallied well and seems to have shifted this latest illness with her usual strength and determination, and the long sleepless nights are lessening slowly.

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