From time to time we all suffer from a bout of low self-esteem and wonder what we can do to make ourselves feel better about who we are and change this self-doubt in confidence. In this blog post the founder of BoM discusses his 5 tips on how you may be able to improve your self esteem and worth.
1.Make a list of your positive traits
This will be tough if you are already suffering from low self-esteem or depression but it is possible. You may not believe it but we ALL have positive traits, skills and talents. I would suggest writing the numbers 1 to 10 down the side of a piece of paper and then start to write what ‘you believe’ you are good at. It is okay if you don’t complete the ten, don’t be hard on yourself ( I know too well that you do this when low self-esteem is a problem) instead, ask a family member or friend what they think you are good at ? It may be a skill or it may be a personality trait! BOTH are relevant! Some people are extremely skilled at painting, for instance, but not very kind or good with people. Someone else, however, may be a master of communication, another a great comic and playful but terrible at organising and mathematics. It is important to identify your strengths and focus on them rather than your weaknesses and shortcomings.
When you have 10 traits of positivity from your own self and those who are around you keep this piece of paper with you at all times and remind yourself ‘you are good enough and have a lot to offer the world’.
2. Practice your passion and strive to master it
My passion is anything to do with creativity. I love art, web design, architecture, graphic design, and music. What is your passion? Try and remember a time that you really really enjoyed yourself, it does exist, just take a look in your memories and you’ll find it! Now, what was it? Is it playing sport? Is it music? Is it just simply being with other people? Whatever it is this is your ‘passion’ and you should do what you can to be involved with this in your current situation. It will make your life more enjoyable and also give you confidence as you begin to become a master of what it is you love! Everything can be turned into a profession, even now people are playing video games for a living, something that was incomprehensible a decade ago.
Choose a job you love and you will never have to work a day in your life. Confucius
3. Don’t let other people disrespect or lower your worth
There are times when, for whatever reason, others around you like to put you down or make you feel small. It is often the case that people that do this have their own insecurities about their lives belittling others gives themselves a bit of a boost to think that ‘they are better’ or their lives are a bit better than yours removing the stress from their own lives. It can also be that sometimes the other people can see something great within you and so try their best to keep you down and stop advancing your ability and lives further, as Albert Einstein once mentioned
Great spirits have always encountered violent opposition from mediocre minds
When people start to disrespect you or lower your sense of worth then it is time to respect yourself enough by standing up for yourself and walking away from those who constantly make you feel small. Those people don’t deserve your talents.
4. Don’t beat yourself up about mistakes, learn from them
We are human, not robots, we all make mistakes so STOP BEATING YOURSELF UP! SERIOUSLY!!! If we never made mistakes we would never ever improve our life or the lives of others. Why would we change anything if nothing was ever wrong? We wouldn’t, we would still be living in caves doing paintings on the wall and hunting wild deer…not much of an existence ay.
It could be said that people with low self-esteem tend to beat themselves up a lot and also tend to be perfectionists and loyal people that always want to do the best for those they work with and for. It is important to realise that not everyone will expect you to get things right first time all the time and most people realise that it is almost impossible to do this! So stop beating yourself up, learn from the mistakes and then let them go, you don’t deserve to be hurting yourself every single day! You are worth a lot!
5. Don’t constantly sacrifice your happiness for others
A biggy! How often do you think ‘I can make this person happy if I do this, I don’t really want to do it but I like to make them happy’? I bet more often than not, right? You care about the other person deeply so you want them to experience the best possible life but…what about your life? Are you experiencing the best possible life too or have you sacrificed your own happiness and short time on this earth to make others happy?!? Really??? You have!!?? What you doing ya bloomin’ nugget!? Stop this. It is okay to on occasions sacrifice what you want for others but if you are doing it again and again and again you will only become low, damage your self-esteem and end up having regrets.
Don’t always sacrifice your happiness for others, balance your sacrifices with what you want too.
How to improve your self esteem
Building up your self-esteem can take time, practice and sometimes, a helping hand. A life coach is often able to help you look at life differently, set goals of what you would like to achieve and give you a motivation to keep going when you struggle to keep yourself motivated and believing in yourself. We have several life coaches on Find Your Therapy directory that has many years of experience that may be able to work with you to change your way of thinking. If you do try to build your self-esteem yourself always try your best to see the positives in yourself, keep the list with you at all times, follow your passion whenever yo get time to do so and never let anyone lower your worth.
You are amazing!